Summary of my week so far

I should have weighed myself Monday morning but it might have been more than I could take. Weekends are my biggest downfall.  I told myself snacks were ok as long as they were measured.  But then I would measure out some more and some more.  UGH!   Did I exercise?  Hell, no!  I am the laziest person I know.  I still walk Brian 5 days a week unless it is raining and again, we don't go far because I don't want to carry a bag of poop with me so I time it just right so we get back home and he can go in our yard..  But I still haven't done anything beyond that.  I could say it again, "maybe tonight", but I have very little faith in myself.  I wish I could remember how I got down this far and what motivated me.
Sunday night was really bad!  I didn't eat lunch and I should have.  Rylee went out and came home with cupcakes.  We had one as a snack and it was so sweet that I about died of a sugar coma.  Then, because I couldn't make the sweet go away, I ended up overeating for supper.  Granted it was potatoes, broccoli and cheese, but still!  Then at bedtime, Rylee, bless her heart, brought me the other one and it was cheesecake!  I was done.  Thankfully, she had to help me eat that one.  On top of all of this, I drank juice instead of water.  I was a walking nightmare!
I need motivation.  Yes, I want to be skinny but that is too easy to put on the back burner.  I despise competitions and they will actually sabotage me.   I do not like shopping so the promise of new clothes doesn't do it for me.  I want to travel but that is a money thing.  I went online and did a half dozen or so "what motivates you" tests.  I learned things about myself that I knew but have never really looked at before.
I can meet a deadline at work, plan an entire wedding in 6 weeks, but not set aside time to paint my toes.  Why?  Because it isn't important enough.  Why isn't it?  Because it only affects me.  I never hold myself accountable to myself for myself.  I won't try harder where I am considered because I won't reward myself.  In a nutshell, I need external affirmation and rewards.
Here is where it gets weird and I thank God my husband loves me.  I went to Jim and asked him to weigh and pay me every Fri morning.  If I lose more than a pound (it has to be at least a pound) than I get $20 for my travel fund.  If I gain then I have to pay him back  $20.  There is the potential to 'earn' $80 a month or over $1000 a year.  I am hoping that having to answer to someone else to get my reward will keep me accountable and that having a 'punishment' will also help.  I know this is weird but if I can make it work it will be great!!
It might not work for everyone or they might not have a husband who is willing to play along with all their quirks.  My suggestion:  go take the tests online to see what motivates you.  Take more than one and jot down some key points that the results show.  Look over your key points when you're done and see what you come up with.  Don't be afraid to try something dumb or odd.  You never know what will change your life.